Validating a Feed

Posted on July 19, 2012 by Joseph

Comparisons and Standards

: My Seal of Approval is all that counts.

We each have standards we live by. Standards are important for measuring and comparing. Without standards we have no knowledge of progress, of completion, or of compliance.

We compare everything to everybody and everything else. Blue is blue as compared to something less or not blue. Up is compared to down, left to right, in to out, etc. Few things are absolute, so much of our comparison is likewise not absolute. However, sometimes we erroneously assign an absolute value to something that is only comparatively less or more than another.

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I Predict a Feed

Posted on June 15, 2012 by Joseph

I like to think I perceive the world as it is. Funny, huh? Even my three year old granddaughter knows not to trust her senses all the time. Sometimes we’re fooled by them.

Why don’t we perceive our universe as it is?

Can you perceive an electron flying around in an atom? Or perceive a single flutter of a hummingbird’s wings? Our senses are so slow and limited, we must rely upon our brains to make up for the limitations in real perception.

That’s why slight of hand magic tricks work – because our brains discount what our eyes see in preference for what we EXPECT to see. Our predictive powers of thought get in our way sometimes. It’s not all bad – sometimes predictions work out fine – like when we watch a bird traverse across our visual field – part of that flight is literally invisible to our eyes, but we see the entire flight path anyway with no loss of apparent visual acuity. We PREDICT the flight path and our brain creates the rest. It’s an astounding ability – that has limitations.

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Coulda Woulda Shoulda

Posted on June 13, 2012 by Carol

No one is safe from a defensive shadow!

“If only” and “what if” are often associated with coulda, woulda and shoulda by playing a part in the regret. Coulda, woulda and shoulda such seemingly innocuous words are often used to create a powerful feed. Those three little words can twist possibilities into absolutes by making what didn’t happen a huge mistake and what might happen a potential disaster.

A good feed begins with the feeder agreeing or disagreeing with the feedee, who is defending their chosen reality. The challenge to one’s reality will always bring up defense. Feedees feed on not being good enough while the feeders, like any predator, feeds on being better than others. Artificially generated claims of knowing and understanding another’s experience all bring on the feast by sheer need to prove validity of reality.

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Regret, the Silent Feed

Posted on April 28, 2012 by Carol

Will your dreams of regret wake you up?

When we are in a state of regret, thoughts of what could have been or should have been rerun over and over, forcing our minds and hearts to play a destructive game of detective that seems to result in more frustration and disappointment.

“IF ONLY” is the common theme of regret, like a whirlpool spinning our hearts and minds into a place of private entrapment. More than intense anger, regret is one of the hardest feelings to shake. Whatever we may imagine we’ve done wrong, negative self judgment can create and maintain an investment that makes regret seem even more real while intensifying those regrets in the process – a self-amplifying loop.

Getting out of the control of a regret feed loop can be as simple as someone accepting you, someone encouraging you, someone introducing humor to your situation, or through medication, counseling, or by other means including pulling yourself up and out by sheer will or a good rest. These may only be temporary interventions, however; creating a permanent change is ultimately up to you.

Separation Calls the Feeder

Posted on April 5, 2012 by Carol

Feeders seek to separate their prey.

Everyone has biases or judgments that support a belief that separating out the best from the rest is important and right. Biases make us feel smart or right through insidious means, dividing our connections with humanity towards a feed. Separation calls the feeder.

We see this in nature. Lions and other predators seeking a feed will focus on the one prey animal that shows signs of or is separate from their group.

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